Time Alone

Time alone is a wonderful thing.

Bedtime

At 10:00 pm I managed to get to the bathroom vanity. I brushed my mouth and tongue with a healthy dose of Crest and headed off to bed.

I used Mike's brush but he never notices, too busy I guess.

Maybe next week he'll realize the toilet is unusually clean.

The pink brush is mine.

He is such a sapp.

Michael encouraged his grand kids to pummel me.

For what felt like hours these underfeed beasts were released from parental control and I took the brunt of total insanity. Here the youngest "girl" is placing a throw rug from the piano bench across my beak and mouth. I couldn't breath or yell for help. Nothing!

I finally ripped my limp carcass from their evil ways about 9:00 pm.

The one in pink pants kept getting a run across the room, leaping in a Ninja death kick and would land deep into my innocent torso.

No gas or internal organs left to empty they left.

One Little Mistake . . . I was hungry!

One small mistake. Crap, I was trapped in that storage room with no lights for days. I thought I was going to freaking die!

So I helped myself to a few cans of Tuna, cheap tuna at that.
Thank goodness Leslie has a heart of gold and helped me into an easy chair, placing a cold towel upon my exhausted soul.

Missing in Action Since Last Week

The Penquin monster had been missing for a few days again. I am used to it , but this time he has broken the limits. After passing the food storage room, I noticed it was smelling like a bilge. I went to investigate and found the top off the salt water tank for the water softener and it was nearly drained then I found his feathery butt digging through the food storage. There must have been thirty open cans of Tuna and two jars of peanut butter on the floor.

I snapped him with arms full as he was climbing down from the rack.

The Adaptations of a Free Range Penguin

Although we are birds, we cannot fly. Another myth that is waiting to be debunked.
Eddie Shackleton can spin circles around the best gulls. But I do have to admit that after living near a continent that is 98% covered with ice, filled with the same types of idiots you folks have in Washington D.C., I just had to find bare land with small rocks to build a new nest. Supposedly Penguins flourish in a harsh environment so this desert stuff of Utah should be a piece of cake.
The scientists consider us remarkable creatures, and believe we “evolved” with many adaptations which make us masters of our environments. Newsflash . . . I was born this way. Over educated idiots.

Off to the Doctor

Hey. This is Michael. After 24 hours of moaning and whimpering about a fatal condition I placed him safely in the back seat and headed to the doctor. He didn’t know the doctor was a vet until we got there and he saw a dog, and a schizophrenic cat.

All is clear. As I expected, but at least I will get some rest now not having to wait on him hand and foot.

Hypocon

I snapped this shot of Yakity on the way back from the Vet. Yes that's a pout on his beak.

Trichomoniasis as a factor in mourning dove population.

Trichomoniasis as a factor in mourning dove population decline in Fillmore, Utah.

So the experts say it is no a problem in Utah but I feel really sick. I'll bet they haven't done any research on the effects of

Trichomoniasis as a factor in Free Range Penquin's in Utah !!!!!

I'm not sounding any alarms here, but I would warn folks not to run off with just any dove you meet under a feeder. My eyes! My Eyes! I think things are getting dimmer.

Tell mom I was a good boy and that rumor about the wild turkey up Hobble Creek is a lie.

I'm too tired to finish this, maybe another day of rest will help. Has anyone got some Visine!

I think I'm gonna hurl carp chunks. I hate Utah lake.